Violence is a Choice
To comprehend violence and the anger that pushes it, one has to know the four basic causes of anger. But even deeper than just that, one has to go to the deepest meaning of who we are, our individual way of being.
There are two ways to be; responsive or resistant. A responsive person is open and kind to those around them; but, a resistant person is closed, unkind, and uncaring. Resistant, self-deceived offenders commit violence from the inner-most sense of who they are.
-People commit violence in their hearts long before their hands do.
-The sign of violence is not a hit, but a way of being.
-Violence is a choice.
-Nonviolence, just like violence, goes deeper than merely behavior.
-Resistant people disconnect themselves from the feelings of others.
-In the resistant way of being, �I hurt other people by reducing them to an object. In this process I elevate myself.�
-In the resistant way of being, �I fight for power without mercy or kindness.�
-"In violating my children, I destroy future generations".
-�If others are violent towards me while I'm violating them, it justifies my actions�
-In the resistant way of being, �I invite problems into my life, not solutions."
-In the violent way of being, �I portray myself in ways that justify me and makes the wrong I do seem right.�
-In the resistant way of being, �I impede the flow of life�s light and energy. I repel others and live a life filled with self.�
Violence in society is brought on by the way of being of its citizenry. To reduce violent behavior, a person has to change from a resistive person to a responsive person. That involves an entire change of being.
Any course that does not approach people at their deepest level is doomed to failure. Anger management and behavior modification methods are just surface remedies that don�t go deep enough to create lasting changes. Cognitive restructuring, if performed properly, is a proven intervention that allows people to become �self aware� and thus more willing to change their individual way of being. Cognitive restructuring isn�t force but an invitation to change. It intervenes at the deepest level where life-long changes can take place.
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About the Author: Larry Lloyd is the founder of American Community Corrections Institute (ACCI), which sponsors a blog about criminal behavior and related topics.
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