Soft Addictions
Soft addictions can be habits, compulsive behaviors, or chronic moods or negative thought patterns. Their essential defining quality is that they gratify a exterior want but ignore the satisfaction of a deeper need. They numb us to feelings by substituting a superficial high for genuine feelings of accomplishment.
Numerous soft addictions involve necessary behaviors like eating, reading, and sleeping. They become soft addictions as soon as we overdo them and start using them for more than their intended purpose. Soft addictions, unlike hard ones such as drugs and alcohol, are charming in their softness. E-mailing, watching television, and talking on the phone all appear to be completely harmless, enjoyable activities. If we open our eyes to see how much time and energy we devote to them, however, we can see how they compromise the quality of our lives.
You should know that an almost infinite variety exists. While a universal soft addiction might be television watching, a more personal soft addiction might be sketching geometric figures or counting items for no reason.
A few individuals have a hard time differentiating an infrequent behavior or fleeting mood from a soft addiction. If you watch television one hour per day, is it only a harmless habit,while if you watch three hours per day (the national average), does it become a soft addiction?
As a general rule, keep the following in mind: The incentive and the function of your behavior determine whether or not it's a soft addiction. For instance, TV can become a window to view new worlds, stimulating viewers with new ideas and leading them into meaningful pursuits -- or it could be a means of escape. There's a lady who's very careful about the shows she watches. She uses TV as a tool to gain knowledge about foreign cultures and to better understand the behavior of animals. Another lady I know vegetates on the couch in front of the TV daily, channel surfing and letting the programs wash over her. Her job is rough and she incorrectly believes her viewing habits reduce her stress. Rarely does she have a specific show she desires to watch or a real reason for watching it. When you contrast the two TV viewers, the differences in motivation and function are easy to see. The first woman's motivation is to gain knowledge; the second woman's motivation is to turn her brain off.
Don't allow soft addictions to take over your life.
About the Author: JUDITH WRIGHT is hailed as a world-class coach, inspirational speaker, best-selling author, and corporate consultant. She is cofounder of the Wright Institute for Lifelong Learning. See her press release her book, "One Decision".
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