The Shadow that Haunts You
“Selfish. Lazy. Mean. Incompetent. Not good enough.” Do any of these words cause you to cringe? What other words cause you to recoil? Through shadow work, we learn to release the power these descriptors may have over us. We often resist internal exploration for fear of finding out the worst, that we are unlovable or unworthy or not good enough. In truth, we find liberation and peace when we galvanize the courage to “jouney” within. We hope this article will encourage you to explore your shadow and reap the many benefits!
In traditional weather lore, if a groundhog emerges from its burrow and fails to see its shadow because the weather is cloudy, winter will soon end. If the groundhog sees its shadow because the weather is bright and clear, it will be frightened and run back into its hole, and the winter will continue for six more weeks.
So often when we see our own shadow we retreat. It’s scary and uncomfortable. The shadow symbolizes the parts of ourselves, albeit wounded, that we most dislike. We’d prefer not to think about them. Like the groundhog, our shadow side frightens us; it represents our vulnerability, our negative tendencies we’d rather people (and ourselves) not know about us. Like our fellow creature, the groundhog, we have our own hideouts where we recoil.
And do you remember the movie “Groundhog Day?” The main character, played by Bill Murray, was forced to live the same day over and over (i.e.patterns) until he came to accept it. Our shadow represents those hidden parts that we believe to be unacceptable. Embracing all of who we are, including our “dark side,” allows concealed gifts to emerge. Here are some transformational ideas for accessing and healing our “shadow side”:
1. Darkness does not respond to anger or hatred. It simply responds to the presence of light. Self-acceptance is key to liberation. You can’t hate something enough to make it go it away. Clear seeing + Compassion = Self-acceptance.
2.The more the shadow is ignored, the stronger it seems to get! Avoidance and denial block our growth.Acknowledgement facilitates a weakening of the shadow’s grip on our psyche.
3. The shadow has an opposite to consider. If you embrace your “dark side,” you permit its contrary characteristic (gift) to emerge. e.g. embracing rage and impulsive anger lends the way to tenderness and peace.
Good Therapy, with an unconditionally loving therapist can provide wonderful healing results in facing and managing our shadow.
About the Author: Dennis Buttimer, M.Ed., practices therapy in Atlanta and focuses on helping people with a wide-variety of issues and I specialize in transitions, anxiety/depression and stress. Dennis is available for therapy and counseling and can be reached here http://www.goodtherapy.org/m15_view_item.html?m15:item=solutions%40buttimer-associates.com and http://www.goodtherapy.org/Atlanta-therapy.htm
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